I have the most fantastic idea EVER!
There should be a 'church engine'.
A search engine much like hotels.com where you pick what you want/don't want/miles you'll travel/type of worship/youth programs/etc.
Watch the hourglass...
A comprehensive listing of churches matching your criteria!
Of course, it's not fool-proof and once you get there, much like the choice you made at hotels.com, you figure out it's not really where you need to be but at least it would be a starting point right?
So far, the only definitive worship marked off our list are the peeps that praise God in the nude. Nakey and Jesus isn't even on my worship radar regardless that He knows what I look like without my clothes on...that doesn't mean I want to know what my pew neighbor looks like without his clothes on (by the way, we made this decision from the comfort of our couch and with the expert help of the National Geographic channel. No real live nakey's were viewed in the making of this decision). We were also able to mark off a Chinese religion that had something to do with the Spirit Man running the streets naked (what is it with these people and there issues with clothing?) being chased by tons of men wearing thongs that appeared to be made out of toilet paper, trying to touch him for good luck and damn near killing him in the process. Steven took issue with the toilet paper thong so that religion isn't on the list either.
So, the search continues. At the end of our journey we may very well end up right back where we started (not the church of the holy couch but the church where we are formal members) but we feel the need to explore what else is out there and what is right for our family. Church should be more than a routine and more than just something you do because it's what you've always done...it should be a relationship. I've never had that and I think it's time it changed.