I debated what to post, what not to post, decided not to post at all then decided that y'all have stuck around this long with me and these guts of mine; listened to me whine and complain; worried with me and gotten mad with me that I decided to be a grown up and just spell it out.
I am going to be as medical as possible. I will not use words like 'butt' or 'poop'. Dignity, people. I still have my dignity (although not a whole lot after today).
So here it goes....
Basically I have several issues that alone are miserable but added together are just really big mess. Some of the things discovered today were a prolapsed rectum, major pelvic floor dysfunction (3 on a scale of 4), the internal hemorrhoids of a 53 year old, abdominal wall nerve damage, anal fissures, and irritable bowel syndrome. One makes the other worse and it all just snow balls into my entire GI system not working (hence the inability to eat without pain...full gut stretches the abdominal wall which increases my pain. The pelvic floor failure, prolapse and hemorrhoids prevent stool from passing with ease therefore creating the fissure.)
The cause is multi fold, too. Having 2 good sized vaginal deliveries, no uterus for support, 5 abdominal surgeries, hormones, just being a girl, inadequate nutrition are all culprits.
Right now we are treating the fissure with medication and making some changes to diet and bowel regimen to try and get things back on track. I am to call him in a few months if I'm not better. He did not think I am crazy. He did not think I have to live like this. He doesn't think there is anything being missed and offered to do further testing. I declined for the time being and am going with his less evasive recommendations first.
As humiliating and painful as the appointment was, it was by far the best hour and a half I've had. He was so kind, candid, caring and informative. Mom and I were both VERY surprised with his bedside manner and his ability to LISTEN and not just hear what I was saying. He didn't just say 'this is this' ... he explained the whys and hows of everything. This man is the messiah of colons.
Thanks to all for the questions, comments, concerns, and prayers. I pray this is the beginning of the end of this situation but I know if it's not, I'll be okay. Hey, I've got a colon god on my side!
PS. Not that you needed further proof that my mother is an angel but...she held my hand, rubbed my back, asked questions, added details I was forgetting, offered tissues and generally made me feel not alone. I can think of 100 other things I'd rather have been doing on my afternoon off, but she spent hers with me. Yes, I am BLESSED! Thanks, Momma...