Sunday, June 27, 2010

My Guts: Another Chapter in the Epic Story

Why hello there, super medicated Anne. Nice nose decoration you've got there. And that bracelet? Awesome.

So yea, Tuesday was loads of fun. Actually, Tuesday wasn't all that bad. Monday? Monday sucked. Liquid diet plus drinking 2 bottles of Magnesium Citrate equals pure misery. Steven and I wheeled into Parkwest and I got (yet another) hospital bracelet. I love how the Covenant Health System has the admin folks in uniforms that look like hotel employees and they use the vibrating pager system like restaurants to notify you when it's your turn. Like you are supposed to forget why you are there and get all excited about a wonderful meal and a cozy bed. That you're not getting. Not even close.

Anyways, I visited the lab. Then went for an abdominal ultrasound then I was taken back to the GI lab. Where I was greeted with very friendly nurses and my MAIN MAN. The anesthesia man. I was very chatty with him. I wanted to be his friend. It worked. My super friendly nurse was rather confused as to my purpose there and kept trying to get me to consent to an EGD and a PEG tube placement. Hold the drugs, honey. Mama didn't sign up for a feeding tube. So, we got that figured out and I got to the bed and several toasty warm blankets. And waited. And waited. The hallway is a rather boring place. After about 20 minutes it was my turn. Dr. SleepyMan says, "hang on doc. I need more Propofol." I'm all yes, we will wait. As long as we need to wait. (This was right after I charmingly blurt out.."hey now, that killed MJ. Please use with caution."). He comes back. Everyone gathers around me. I turn on my left side. Then my other left side (I was nervous I guess). The nurse puts a bite guard in my mouth. She says have a good nap. Next thing I know, I'm drooling on a pillow and Steven's in the corner playing on his phone. So yea, that was fun.

Doc came in and told us the colon looked just fine. Said the stomach and esophagus were red and inflamed, that he took a lot of biopsies and really didn't think it was h pylori (the bacteria that started all this a year and a half ago). I was given lovely color photos of my insides, a Coke, and we were on our way home.

Friday they called with the biopsy results. No cancer..good. Positive for h pylori...bad. So, here we are, a year and a half later and no better than we were when all this started. Which really hacks me off since Dr. No English INSISTED to me that the last round would take care of it and there was no reason to re scope. Had he re scoped, we would have known it wasn't gone. And maybe the lady wouldn't have been trying to give me a dang feeding tube!

I will say, that as mad and disappointed as I am about this, I do have some relief. Relief that there is a reason why my stomach hurts so much. Why I don't want to eat. Why I feel like crap all the time. I'm not crazy. I'm not making a mountain out of a molehill. I'm not a whiny baby (well, maybe I am. But I have a reason. Sometimes).

Please, sweet baby Jesus, let these (different from twice before) meds work and let's please move on from the epic saga of my GI system.

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