Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Migraines can SUCK IT

Not a very nice title huh? Well, I really don't care at this point.

I have been in pain since Monday morning. I tried all my usual tricks (3 different migraine meds, caffeine, hot tub, protein) to no avail. I slept the majority of the day and thankfully Steven was off and able to take care of both me and the kids. Tuesday dawned with my head still pounding so I called my primary care for an appointment. I got in at 11 and was walking out by 11:30. He gave me a shot in the hip of Demerol and Phenegran and sent me home to sleep. When I woke up at 4 with the headache no better I called him back and he sent me to the ER for IV meds and fluids. The wait was minimal and the nursing staff was very kind. The doctor on the other hand? Easily the worst man I have ever dealt with. He said everything short of coming out and saying that he thought I was there just looking for drugs. It still amazes me how in this day and age people are still discriminated against based on their illness and who is with them. Needless to say, I left the ER still in pain because this fellow refused to give me the meds I know work for me. I came home and slept through the night and woke up again today with my head still hurting. I managed a shower and trip to the pharmacy. My self medicating has numbed the pain to a manageable level. I am hopeful it stays that way.

While I know this sounds just horrible, I often wish I had a tangible reason for these headaches. Something that the doctors can SEE so they will believe me when I am in such pain. Something that gives a reason. Something that gives them something to say "yea, no wonder this girl is so miserable." Migraines suck. People who have never had them just don't understand how a "headache" can literally turn your world upside down. How the pain is so bad you can't take care of yourself, much less your children/family. Migraines don't just affect me. They affect my children, my husband, and even my parents and sisters. They cause me to have to cancel plans with friends; have appointments that have been on my calendar for months not even register when I miss them; have my children tip-toeing and whispering in their own home, scared of disturbing Mommy. It sucks. There is no other way to put it. This sucks.


Anonymous said...

Being a former member in good standing of the migraine club, I DO understand and would take it from you if I could. I love you. Mom

Amanda said...

I completely agree with the comment that people who have never had one have no idea what they are like. My best friend from college called me a couple of years after we graduated in tears saying "I am so sorry! I never understood what you were going through! I'm sorry I wasn't more helpful!" She had experienced her first migraine and realized all those times she would come banging into my room, turning on all the lights and yelling for me to get up and get out didn't really help matters!! I was sad she had a migraine but a little glad to know her empathy level had increased a little!
I'm really sorry yours suck so badly. I pray someday soon you will find the magic drug or environment combination to stop them in the tracks!

Anonymous said...

Wow I had to cry. That made me so sad. I can't imagine. I had a bad day but reading this makes me think at least you weren't in physical can't do anything pain that effects everyone around you. What your mom said is so sweet as a momma you know she means it she would take it for you just so you wouldn't hurt. I really hate that for you. I had a migrane (I guess thats what it was?!) it was over 10 years ago and I remeber it like yesterday. At Camelot and it hit all of a sudden I had the worst headache of my life couldnt drive, was driven to the hospital and it hurt so bad I really thought I was having a brain anurism had spinal tap!!??? I still have no idea what happened really good drugs and went home never again weird? Melissa