Thursday, January 31, 2008

Thank you, God!

I woke up this morning and my throat didn't hurt! WOO-HOO!!

Let me back up a few days so you'll understand my happiness.

Monday was a good day as I previously wrote. Tuesday, not so much and Wednesday was even worse. I did go to work on Tuesday but as the day wore on I hurt more and more. Wednesday was more of the same. Tuesday night when I tried to eat a bowl of oatmeal and couldn't swallow it I decided that I was seeing Dr Sexton on Wednesday. That I didn't care if I was a baby, he thought I was nuts or anything else. I was in a lot of pain and MISERABLE! They were able to get me in yesterday at 215. I went to work until my appointment then headed over to Ft. Sanders. Low and behold, he looked in my throat and said everything looked just as it should and he couldn't see any reason why I was in so much pain and unable to swallow. I felt tears come to my eyes. I didn't want anything to be wrong, but a reason would have been terrific. He chalked it up to nerve damage and put me on another pack of steroids. I left his office feeling pretty crappy, emotionally and phyically.

We went on to church and all that last night. I took a shower and washed my hair and when I laid down at 1045 there wasn't a part of my body that didn't hurt. Arissa woke me up to take her to school and there was no pain. I swallowed and it didn't hurt! My jaws felt better, too!

So--I am at work now. I am waiting on someone to come by then I am heading out. I am exhausted and am going to listen to my body. I have to remember that I still have mono, am anemic, immuno-compromised, and still recovering from surgery so I can't go all gung-ho or I'll end up miserable again. This lesson I have learned the hard way many times over.

Since I am FINALLY able to eat I will be celebrating my birthday this weekend! Arissa is taking me to a movie on Saturday and we're doing lunch at Mom and Dad's on Sunday. The hard part is deciding what I want to eat. I WANT IT ALL!!!

Here's to more GOOD days-

Monday, January 28, 2008

Brighter Days

I woke up this morning feeling much better. Momma came out last night and snuggled with me on the couch. I needed my Momma and she knew that just from reading my blog. She didn't call...just showed up. That is saying something since we aren't exactly down the street. I slept in the bed last night...first time in several nights. So, I slept good and woke up feeling almost like a new person. I took Arissa to school and came back home and crashed for a few more hours. Steven woke me up to get ready to go to UT and I actually took a shower, washed my hair and brushed my teeth. What a difference being clean makes!

Steven and I went to UT for my arthrogram. I was very anxious about this test. Needles in my jaw joints just didn't sound like much fun so I was very nervous. Dr. McCoy joked and was really cool about the whole thing. He told me that it wouldn't be anywhere near the tonsil pain. He also said that if it was him, he would still be taking lots of pain medicine and he was surprised I was there for my test. He numbed me up really well and while I won't go into too many details, I'll just say it was an experience. He injected both sides with steroids after he was done taking his pictures. The numby medicine is starting to wear off and I'm sore; but nothing too horrible.

I am aiming to cook dinner tonight and go to work tomorrow.

My throat is a little better today so hopefully that means each day will be better. I long to eat!! I want a buffet of EVERYTHING as soon as I can swallow without pain.

Thanks for checking in and for hanging around...even when my entries are doom and gloom.

Love you all--

Sunday, January 27, 2008


My nerves are shot
I've had 7 surgeries in 7 1/2 years; 6 of them in the past 2 1/2 years
Everything that is supposed to be simple is never simple for me
My family and friends like to find the jokes about it
Me, not so much
It makes me feel miserable; like a failure
Like it is somehow my fault that my body doesn't do what I want it to do
Here I am 11 days post op and still miserable
I don't want to call my doctor cause I'm afraid he'll make me feel like an idiot
Everything I have read online tells me I am not alone in being an adult with a long and painful recovery time but my doctor didn't seem to feel that way when I saw him earlier this week
I am almost out of pain medicine and don't know what I'll do once it is gone
I have tried using over the counter stuff but it doesn't touch the pain
I have lost weight (a plus to this situation) but how I am losing it isn't very fun. Water and applesauce has gotten very old
I don't want to talk to anybody
I don't want to go anywhere
At least my bowels are working (2 laxatives a day to help that)....God knows I don't need that on top of everything else
The kids are over it
Steven is over it
I want to scream; can't though...hurts too bad
I want to cry; can't though.....hurts too bad

I have a joint test scheduled for tomorrow at UT. I am scared. I am sure it is going to hurt and be uncomfortable. I am scared they will tell me the only way to help me is to operate. I can hear everyone now yammering on about Anne having another surgery.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Another Year Gone By

Another birthday that I was too sick to enjoy. Arissa woke me up this morning with her sweet little voice wishing me Happy Birthday and telling me that she wanted to take me to the movies tonight with the Regal money she got for Christmas. She said she would pay for everything, for all 4 of us to go and for the concession stand. What an incredibly sweet little girl. I told her I'd let her know. I already knew the answer but didn't want to burst her bubble so early in the day. She told me that Steven was going to take me to dinner after the movies. It seems as if my whole family thought that since it was my birthday that I would wake up back to 100% and up to going out and eating. No such luck. I would have LOVED for that to have happened but it wasn't so.

I have received several phone calls, emails and MySpace comments all wishing me a good day. Too bad my throat didn't get the message......

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Post Op; Day 7

One week ago today I had the surgery.
One week ago today when I left the surgery center I felt pretty decent. The surgical drugs wore off a long time ago and I just can't seem to get it (and keep it) under control.
I expected to awaken to a 'new' me seeing as how I got the shot in the ASS of steroids yesterday. I even slept on the couch thinking keeping my head elevated might help.
Still feel the same as I did yesterday. Still can't eat. Still can't drink anything but water.
I am officially OVER IT.

Phone just rang...Dr McCoy's office (oral surgeon) has a cancellation for this Monday for my joint testing. Let the good times roll!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Post Op Visit

Steven took me today to see Dr Sexton. He was a bit alarmed at the amount of pain I am still in but felt it was within the 'normal' range. I REFUSE to let him make me feel like a baby. I have been through ALOT and I know what pain feels like. I know I am not supposed to be pain free less than a week out but I also know that barely being able to swallow isn't the place I should be at, either. He gave me a Celestol (sp?) steroid shot to boost the steroids I have been taking since the surgery. He hopes that will get me over the hump and feeling better soon. He was very kind and just felt that, for whatever reason, this is more painful for me than others. I really want to go into the office tomorrow so I hope these 'roids do the trick.

Isaiah spent Sunday day/night over at his friends, Jonathan, house. He had a great time playing their Wii. Arissa spent Sunday day/night with the Bakers. Isaiah came home about noon on Monday and Carol brought Arissa to me around 1. I was very proud of myself that I called on the people who had offered their help and took them up on their offer. Both families seemed thrilled that I called and asked for help.

As usual, both kids have been WONDERFUL about helping me out. Isaiah is almost offended when I get something for myself.

I need to go pick up my script from Kroger and get Arissa from Granny's. The kids have CCD tonight, which I am in charge of transportation for them and Kamry. I'm on the fence about whether I should fool with it. I am gone from 545-915 and I am leaning towards letting them skip for tonight.

The dance was wonderful. Arissa said that the danced to all the songs 'worth dancing to' and that Steven didn't embarrass her!

We've had some 'inclement' weather here. Black ice-no snow. The kids went in 2 hours late today. That is funny b/c Wednesday is a short day so basically they went for lunch then came home. They weren't even there long enough to earn homework. Makes my night easier!

So--I guess I'll just sit and wait for my 'roids to kick in.....


Saturday, January 19, 2008

Day 3; 7:30pm

Steven giving Arissa her corsage

Her pretty flower--check out my photog skillz!
Posing before they leave
The normal Arissa/Daddy pose
They are off to their dance. I am sure they will have a great time together! Times like this remind me of the many blessings in our life. Steven isn't a father, he is a Daddy, even if not by blood.

Day 3; 6:20pm

Although they aren't leaving for another 40-45 minutes, Arissa is all dressed and ready to go. Yes, she has a sweater to wear over her shoulders.

Day 3; 4:30pm

Steven is up and has finally answered Arissa's question....they will be attending the Father/Daughter dance tonight. She is so excited she can hardly stand it. Luckily, thanks to Aunt Heather, we already have a dress suitable for such an occasion. I put a bug in Steven's ear that she will need a corsage...hopefully he won't forget.

So, to add to my plate of misery, I will primping my baby girl for a night out with her main man.

Day 3; 3pm

Pain is still wavering. I am good the first hour-hour and a half after taking it. Then I am miserable for the remaining hour-hour and a half. I got the potato down with some struggles but I feel a bit better having something in my stomach. I can't sleep. I'm worn out exhausted but can't sleep. I decided to call Dr Sexton (surgeon) just to make sure there wasn't something else I can do. He told me to cut the time in between medicine dosages just a little bit and try eating only very cold food and drinks. He was very kind and told me to call him back if I didn't start feeling better. I love the technology of today...I called his office that transferred me to his answering service who then transferred me to him. I didn't have to wait for a call back.

I took a bath so at least I am clean while I feel like hell.

Day 3; 12 noon

On to my second dose of pain meds for the day and they are finally starting to help. I decided I needed to put something on my stomach so I had Isaiah put a potato in the oven for me. He put one in for himself, too. I forgot the taters we have are the smaller, bagged variety and not our usual robust baking potatoes. I left them in too long. I stuck a fork in the first one to see how smooshy it was. Perfect Potato. I stuck a fork in the other potato....BAM...the damn thing blew up, shooting its hot steamy starch clear to the french doors. Sweeping hot potato doesn't work too well but it did help get the big chunks up. I had to do some mini-mop action to get the stickies off the floor. Isaiah was kind enough to give me the surviving tater since he has eaten once today already. Now the kitchen stinks of burning tater. Thankfully we have a self cleaning oven.

Day 3; 9am

Woke up in horrible pain. I can't talk. I don't know if it is because it is day 3 or if it is because I am an idiot and ate a few bites of lasagna and then a grilled cheese sandwich. Whatever the reason, I am in major pain. I have taken all my medicine (normal 3 pills plus my pain medicine, steroid and antibiotic) and managed to get a few bites of applesauce down. Hopefully I will start to feel the effects soon.

Isaiah has woken up and is feeling better. He is still snotty but his headache is gone.

Arissa is still sleeping. She was feeling better last night so hopefully she'll wake up even better.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Good Times, Good Times

So the surgery went well. I woke up in terrible pain though. It turned out to be much worse than I had expected. They gave me several pushes of Morphine, Fentnyl and Demerol but I was still hurting very badly. They made me eat some Applesauce so they could give me the first dose of oral pain meds. I took that and was still miserable so they gave me another push of Demerol. That did the trick. I felt much better after I got that. I was in pretty bad pain yesterday. It hurts to swallow-it hurts not to swallow; it hurts to talk-it hurts not to talk. I can only drink water or Starbucks bottled frapps. I tried Gatorade and it BURNED. As far as eating goes, applesauce is the easiest. I finally went to sleep about 11 last night and slept really good. I woke up a few times but went right back to sleep. I am feeling better today but still feel like hell. The pain is worse about an hour and a half before I am due for more medicine.

Arissa told me last night that her back was itching. When I put lotion on it I thought it felt like sandpaper. Then I looked at her neck and it, too, was rashy looking and had a change in the pigment. She told me her head and stomach hurt. After I put her to bed last night Mom asked me if I was sending her to school today and I realized I hadn't even thought of that. I went to Arissa and asked her if she needed to stay home and she said she wasn't sure (Arissa LOVES school and hates to miss) so then I asked her if she needed to go see Dr James and she said yes. Arissa knows her stuff because Dr James diagnosed her with strep (positive rapid strep); scarlet fever; some fungal skin thing that pulls the pigment from the skin; and a yeast infection. No wonder she's been weepy the past few days..the poor kid didn't feel well. Dr James was impressed with Arissa's ability to self diagnose because visually she looked fine; her throat isn't even red.

So, after we left the office we stopped at Kroger to get her script filled and buy me some more applesauce and get her chicken noodle soup. We came home, ate, got in our jammies and watched DVD's on the couch.

Isaiah is coming down with what appears to be a cold. Thankfully they have a 3 day weekend so they have time to rest and get better.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008


I got a new hair-do. I took out the light red and blonde and went with more of my natural color. This is actually a bit darker than my natural color but it will fade. I resisted the urge to try a new style and just had a few inches trimmed to shape it up. It is growing on me. The kids really like it.....

Saturday, January 12, 2008

The Past 24 Hours in Review

Actually, it started Thursday. I had extreme jaw and neck pain. I am off my anti inflammatory meds until after my surgery due to the increase chance of bleeding they cause during surgery. I don't know if it would have happened anyways or if it was just because of that. I left work a little early yesterday and came home to the couch because I really wasn't feeling well. I took a nap yesterday evening then went to sleep about 1130.

I slept just horrible--kept having weird dreams that I was being robbed (Steven was at work) yet they were stealing our barn of all things. Mind you, there is not truck access to the barn and it isn't on a concrete slab but in my dream all that was left was the slab. I woke up to an arm that was dead asleep but rearranged and got back to sleep. The next dream involved someone close having a baby (not clear who) and I was faced with the dilemma of putting a picture of the new baby or leaving the dashboard Jesus on the top of my page. Woke up again with the whole left side of my body asleep.

I woke up again at 6am and that is when the 'fun' really began. I was puking to beat the band. I was up every 20 minutes and at times had it coming out of both ends (overshare, I know). My head and mainly my eyes were hurting so bad I could hardly see (MAJOR MIGRAINE!). It was a real struggle for me b/c as you all know, I can be quite the baby at times such as these and the kids were asleep and Steven wasn't off work yet. I was trying to keep it together until Steven got home but his phone was in his bag and he never heard it ring. I wasn't sure if he was coming straight home or going to the gym so I called for back up. Luckily, Kathy answered her phone and was over in no time. She had to wait a few minutes since I was, once again, in the bathroom. She got me to the ER and in her defense, she tried her best to have me sit down while waiting to register but I was sure I was fine. Um, not. I felt my knees buckle under me and heard Kathy scream my name and then HELP! She did great and I never hit the floor. They got me in a wheelchair and took me right back to a room (the plus side, if any, of passing out). I know I was sick because I let the nurse undress me and didn't even care that she was seeing my boobies and hairy pits. I proceeded to 'show' them how sick I was at least 2 more times before I saw a doc. Kathy is certainly a mom because she didn't even flinch while I tossed my cookies and she held my hair and wiped my brow with a cold rag. I tell you what, she took as good care of me as Momma does. The finally got an IV started and got some fluids and meds in me. They didn't mess around and went right to the strong drugs. They numbed the heck out of me but it was short lived and (it seemed like mere minutes to me but I am sure it was longer) my eyes were once again killing me. They gave me more meds. The same thing happened again. Apparently my blood pressure was dropping with each push of meds and not coming back up so they had to stop. They gave me a lesser combination of meds and decided that since I was better than when I came in, to let me go home with oral meds.

In between all this, Kathy left to be a mommy, Steven arrived and left and Mom came. Steven had worked all night (and has to work tonight) and hadn't been to sleep as of early afternoon so he called Mom to sit with me and bring me home. We dropped off my scripts and Momma brought me home. I made some toast and got a soda to try something on my belly. Mom left to get Arissa and Isaiah from Granny's and to pick up my meds. She took the kids home with her so that Steven and I could get some sleep and not have to worry with the kids.

I slept for a few hours and woke up feeling much better. I am hungover but my head is only a 2 or 3 on a scale of 10. It was an 8 pushing 9 this morning. My stomach has handled the toast and a baked potato so hopefully I am headed in right direction.

I have to share with you the new Arissa 'do'. Her Aunt Connie (Steven's sister) relaxed her hair for her and it is stunning. The jury is still out about how we feel about it. Arissa LOVES it and so do I but its just so different! She looks really grown up and I think that is part of the problem.....

Tomorrow we will be at Momma and Daddy's to celebrate Mom's birthday. She turns 58 on Monday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOMMA! THANKS FOR ALWAYS BEING HERE! I LOVE YOU!!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Here we go again

The ENT didn't turn out the way I was hoping for. He promptly announced that the tonsils needed to be removed. I am having the surgery this Thursday, the 17th. I am going to the same place where I had my nose/sinus/etc. done last summer. I love the people at the Surgery Center. They treat their patients really, really well. That, and my insurance covers them 100%. I am taking off Thursday and Friday and hope to be back in the office, even if just for a few hours, on Monday. Of course, with me we all know how my plans go.....I am thinking positive though!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

This and That

Let's see where to begin...
New Years Eve was spent in Winchester with Aunt Heather and her family. Isaiah, Arissa, Savannah and Jameson had tons of fun and none of them were too happy when I announced it was time to leave. Steven had to work and even though it was our first New Years apart I still managed to have a good time.

Wednesday I went back to work as full time as I can get. I worked 7 hours Wednesday; 6 1/2 Thursday; and 4ish on Friday. I slept from Friday at midnight until 630 PM Saturday and was back asleep at 1130 and had to be woken up for church at 10 on Sunday. I am thinking that work wore me out! I was off yesterday (see below) but was back in action today for a full 7 hours. Tomorrow will be a short day (see below) and the rest of the week should be full steam ahead.

Yesterday we went to the oral surgeon. He wasn't my most favorite of folks in the beginning but we ended up cool with each other. He pretty much had his mind made up about me before he even examined me. I seriously hate it when people (doctors) decide they know all about you before they even know the facts. He was certain that I only needed a splint and some PT but that he would 'take a look at me anyways'. Once he felt, heard, saw the ways of my jaw his tune quickly changed. I am now scheduled for what is sure to be a painful test involving contrast being injected directly into my joints. That can't be done until Feb 4th so we are still in a holding pattern.

I am going to the ENT (yes, the same evil Dr Nose that tortured me last summer when I had my nose/sinuses/turbinates done) tomorrow afternoon. I am getting strep, yet again, and Steven has decided that the tonsils must be taken out. I have no idea what the actual physicians opinion might be but I am hoping that stronger antibiotics will be enough. I would say the 'normal' antibiotics I have been given aren't enough for this body of mine that is used to IV meds. Plus, the mono and the zero immune system can't be helping.

Added to my plate has been the opening of Sara's store. I am so thrilled for her to finally have it open and even having real customers! It is a super cute shop and has all that a cheerleader, gymnast, or dancer might need or want (not to mention custom embroidery). So, if you're an Oak Ridger and need things of that nature...give me a shout and I'll get you directions, etc.

Steven had a game yesterday...they lost. Probably because I wasn't there. He said he played terrible. He had been off since Friday night and his schedule is a mess, he woke up 15 minutes before the game started.

The kids got their report cards....Isaiah had all A's, B's and 2 C's. Arissa had all A's and has improved a grade level in reading (was 5th grade--now 6th). I was happy with both of them, although I would LOVE a good report card out of Isaiah that didn't require me to beat him for the grades first!

I suppose that is all for now--


Thursday, January 3, 2008

We're a 3 Bong Family

I found this utterly hysterical

There's going to be trouble
Make that a double

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

The Year in Review....the cheaters way

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Spent the summer with my children

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't recall making a resolution last year......

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Not that I am aware of (which if I'm not aware of it then how close to me could they really be?)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Thankfully, no

5. What countries did you visit?
I am guessing Hilton Head won't qualify as a country huh?

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Aug 29th....the date the evil uterus was removed

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

9. What was your biggest failure?
Having grace and faith

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
That's a loaded question isn't it?

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My laptop

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My favorite physician with his porcelain veneers (Dr Vick)

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The evil Dr Butt (pun intended and yes, he really was an ass)

14. Where did most of your money go?
Like this answer will surprise you--CO-PAYS AND STARBUCKS, BABY!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My Botox!!!!!

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Sadder
b) thinner or fatter? Fatter
c) richer or poorer? oh-so-much-freaking poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercising patience

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With my family

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?
I stayed in love - way more worthwhile

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Anything on Discovery Health or TLC

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope, hated him last year too

24. What was the best book you read?
Does People Magazine count?

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Sirius Satellite Radio

26. What did you want and get?
My laptop

27. What did you want and not get?
Health, strength, energy

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 31 yet have no idea what I did!

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Mo' money.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
if it's clean, and it fits, it works.

32. What kept you sane?
You are assuming I am sane.....

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Tiki Barber, man he's HOT

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

35. Who did you miss?

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Not met, but reconnected in a major way---Heather

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
What goes in, MUST come out!

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.